Since I was 10, I've never wanted to do anything but write. What I've wanted to write has changed: poetry, stories, novels, magazine articles, newspaper articles.
A week ago today, for the first time in a decade, I considered doing something else. Crazier still, I think I just might do it.
I'm just as enthusiastic about newspaper journalism as ever. I love shedding light on the important issues of the world and giving citizens the tools they need to be a member of society. There's so much going on, and it would be a privilege to report it all. But I've been thinking about my lifestyle: it's busy, over-programmed, over-scheduled. I do too much.
I used to love it, but now I hate it. I'm perpetually exhausted, perpetually out of breath, perpetually way too much. I hate that I plan coffee dates with friends a week in advance, that I plan my sleep schedule, that I calculate how many minutes it takes for me to eat meals, then try to eat in less time than that. I hate that I don't do homework until the last minute, because I no longer focus well unless I'm on a deadline. I hate that I haven't been to the Rec Center in weeks, but I've been to countless restaurants and coffee shops, typically when I'm en route to some other destination.
God has given me many wake-up calls over the past several years. I listen, for about two days, but I rarely take steps to actually slow my life down permanently.
Well, God, I'm listening.
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2 comments:
Sarah! This is news to me! What have you been considering? What is God telling you? We need to talk--I have so much to tell you.
I'm praying for you! Thank you for calling and sharing the other night. It was - as always - GREAT to talk with you!
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